in stories featuring aliens, they’re always like “on my planet this never happens!” or “in my culture, this differs from your human culture.” and that’s neat and all because i like worldbuilding and all that jazz but wouldn’t it be fun if they just. couldn’t do that?
i want a story where humans encounter an alien who frustrates them because they don’t know enough to tell them anything concrete
like humans will ask “tell us about politics in your planet!” and the alien’s all “uh… hold on it’s been a while since i took gov. um….”
"what sorts of plants grow on your planet?"
"i dunno i grew up in the suburbs. they’re like… purple? idk what you want me to say"
"tell us about the culture on your planet!"
"do you have any idea how many fucking countries are back home, i don’t even know where to begin"
"your planet is obviously much more scientifically and technologically advanced than ours. is it possible for you to enlighten us on certain matters concerning space travel, or would that be a form of interference you must avoid?"
"naw it’s cool, it’s just that, um, i’m a philosophy major"
This always bugged me about the “tell me about your planet” thing. Can you imagine just plucking some random person off Earth and going “tell me about the culture and politics on Earth”? Chances are pretty low you’d get somebody who would be able to answer many much less all of their questions with real accuracy. And having one person represent an entire planet (much less culture or region) is always hilarious to me. Also how alien planets in fiction almost always only have one culture, one language, and one climate.
Of course, a lot of the reasons why we treat alien cultures like this in fiction (besides that it’s easier than inventing a whole diverse planet, especially if you’re just making a TV show) is that aliens are often analogues or stand-ins for non-white people (with humans being the white people), and they’re treated much like PoCs are treated now. Like, a single PoC is expected to represent their race, speak for their culture, explain all the questions white people have, and often answer for a country they don’t currently live in, hardly lived in, or never lived in. So I think changing the way we treat aliens in fiction should start with changing the way we see and treat PoCs in real life.