零 (ling)/30s (THEY/THEM/佢)
art tag: #a pile of bread
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wholesome90stv

X-Files Season 6 behind the scenes

bossymarmalade

they make the best aliens because little girls are fucking bizarre, nobody else can match that energy

froginakettle

In an interview he said that the boys always ended up breaking their costumes bc they would fight each other, but the girls Got. Into. Character. and were amazing creepy little aliens. 

Astrophysicist gets magnets stuck up nose while inventing coronavirus device

jabberwockypie:

mr-chatterboxs-column:

tawghasa:

dstroym:

You have to read this one - it keeps getting funnier and funnier as you continue through the story.

image

 - the photo in the link image, where he looks comically grumpy about being photographed, was the one he himself provided

 - “he was trying to liven up the boredom of self-isolation with the four powerful neodymium magnets”

 - ““I accidentally invented a necklace that buzzes continuously unless you move your hand close to your face,” he said.”

 - “Before attending the hospital, Reardon attempted to use pliers to pull them out, but they became magnetised by the magnets inside his nose.”

 - ““My partner took me to the hospital that she works in because she wanted all her colleagues to laugh at me.””

I lost it at “Denies further magnets”

dstroym

You have to read this one - it keeps getting funnier and funnier as you continue through the story.

tawghasa

image
mr-chatterboxs-column

 - the photo in the link image, where he looks comically grumpy about being photographed, was the one he himself provided

 - “he was trying to liven up the boredom of self-isolation with the four powerful neodymium magnets”

 - ““I accidentally invented a necklace that buzzes continuously unless you move your hand close to your face,” he said.”

 - “Before attending the hospital, Reardon attempted to use pliers to pull them out, but they became magnetised by the magnets inside his nose.”

 - ““My partner took me to the hospital that she works in because she wanted all her colleagues to laugh at me.””

jabberwockypie

I lost it at “Denies further magnets”

sandersstudies

One of the baristas at a nearby Starbucks makes me lose my mind every time I’m working there by saying things that are not outside the spectrum of normal human words but are just slightly off-the-wall.

Barista: Welcome to Starbucks, home of delicious, what deliciousness can I put in motion for you today?

Customer: … Can I get a trenta pink drink please?

Barista: Go big or go home, we here at Starbucks appreciate your commitment, what else can I get started for you?

***

Customer: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.

Barista: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

***

Barista: *slams open drive-thru window* HI HOW ARE YOU?

Customer: …I’m pretty good.

Barista: Are you ready to be even better? Because you’re about to be. *hands them their coffee* 

***

Barista, realizing that a drink was made wrong: *slams open window* SO how do you feel about surprises?

Customer: ….they’re okay.

Barista: Great because I’m about to give you one.

***

Barista: You have two drinks so I am going to hand you two straws which means, FANTASTIC news, these straws double as drumsticks. / You have one drink so I am going to hand you one straw and, promise not to tell anyone, this straw doubles as a magic wand.

***

Barista: Here are those cake pops, I plucked them fresh from the tree myself.

***

Barista: *slams open window, holding drink* Amazing, fantastic, delicious, you are a very lucky man/woman!

***

Barista, realizing drink is being delayed or remade: Looks like it’s gonna be just one minute so they have time to put the extra love in.

***

Barista: I’ll be with you in one hot second. *beat* WOW that second sure was hot!

Anyway she has a few dozen catchphrases she rotates appropriately and it’s both distracting and fantastic to listen.

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