零 (ling)/30s (THEY/THEM/佢)
art tag: #a pile of bread
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paracartography

Yes, of course I’ve heard what the superstitious locals say: “Stay out of the mountains! There’s no shelter on those harsh peaks, and every last combe and glen is infested with killer spiders!”. They say there’s no way to safely cross that mountain range - anyone trying to rest high up on the peaks will die of exposure, lashed by cruel icy winds. Better that, though, than to risk seeking shelter in the forested vales.

The Crawling Death, they call it. Great glossy black eight-legged fiends, some small enough to creep between the rings of your maille, some large as a splayed hand and quick as a cat, and some - so they say - the size of dogs. Or swine. Or cart-horses. The tales have been exaggerated in the telling, of course, since hardly anyone dares venture far into the gullies and ravines that lace between the majestic peaks (most certainly not at night, when the Crawling Death make their appearance, silent as a shadow).

Even if they’re not quite as large as people say, they’re certainly no less deadly. The king’s physicians, who had the unenviable task of tending to the survivors of the last failed expedition, wrote down in stomach-turning detail the precise symptoms of that merciless venom. Erupting blisters the size of a hen’s egg. Flesh blackening, rotting, and sloughing away from the bone. Sweating, drooling, trembling, nausea, vomiting, ranting and raving and spasming like a creature possessed until death seems like a mercy. Others were gripped with a pain unmatched by any wound of war, paired (curiously) with an erection hard as any standing stone.

And yet, in spite of all this, I’m planning an expedition into the mountains. It’s true, I haven’t the equipment with me to safely shelter from the bitter cold above the tree-line, out of the reach of skittering legs and poison-slick fangs. I have no blessing from the gods, and no miracle of alchemy intended to keep the Crawling Death at bay. What I do have, though, is a map. A map from a past age, a more enlightened age, where the cartographers had a decent understanding of the sciences, rather than the encyclopaedic knowledge of rumour and superstition that seems to be the requirement for a mapmaker these days. And from this map - and the journals that I found with it - I have deduced one particularly salient fact, that I am convinced will allow me to make the journey through the supposedly arachnid-infested ravines in perfect safety.

The superstitious peasants might say every last one of those valleys is crawling with deadly poisonous creatures, but in fact, most of them are utterly empty and safe! However, my map has revealed the source of this rumour: Spiders Gorge, which contains over ten thousand spiders, is an outlier adn should not have been counted.

saxifraga-x-urbium

i feel you deserve some sort of prize for this

it is inevitable that fantasy races and worlds will one day invent smooth, comfortable, hard working wrangler fit denim jeans
spacetwinks

dragons, dwarves, orcs, elves, humans, ghosts, and blood gods alike can’t resist the comfortable, casual look and fit of this deep blue denim

Anonymous sent
So I've been slowly making my way through gintama right, and wow fuck this anime. I hate this anime so much. and I thought the benizakura arc was bad?! nah son f UCK the kabuki district arc FUCK. it was all fun and games and then the shit hit the gotdamn fan. all these characters have the tears flowing especially gintoki?? and the yorozuya?? and everyONE ELSE?!? like?!? where in the FUCK do they do that at??? shit man don't watch gintama it will RUIN YOUR LIFE AND THEN SOME

sound advice from anonymous. dont watch gintama.

  1. donkey: im in me friend's swamp... broom broom
  2. shrek: get out me swamp!
  3. donkey: aww :/
earth-dad

donkey: im in me friend's swamp... broom broom shrek: get out me swamp! donkey: aww :/

Anonymous sent
What is happening with omocat ? :-0

someone pointed out how her obsession w shotacon and her shota merchandise is uncomfortably based in pedophilia and she responded by throwing a tantrum on twitter w smash hit tweets like

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your personal preference is little boys and you are an adult

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“how dare u persecute me for romanticizing the sexual abuse of young boys”

arisupamyupamyu

you missed the best one

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Track
What I've Been Looking For
Artist
High School Musical
nicoosuxx

i’ve never had someone that knows me like you do, the way you do! i’ve never had someone as good for me as you.. no one like you! so lonely before i finally found what i’ve been looking for.

❁ sister signs ❁
louis2k10

it is very important that people know their sister signs, because the compatibility between two tends to get disregarded when in actuality you are the yin to their yang— their other half! it is likely that you may have had a friend/friends or a crush/crushes that were your sister sign (or the sister sign of your moon sign).

aries ➥ libra
taurus ➥ scorpio
gemini ➥ sagittarius
cancer ➥ capricorn
leo ➥ aquarius
virgo ➥ pisces

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