零 (ling)/30s (THEY/THEM/佢)
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I think one thing you can do to help your friends who are depressed is to reach out to them not in the spirit of helping, but in the spirit of liking them and wanting their company. “I’m here to help if you ever need me” is good to know, but hard to act on, especially when you’re in a dark place. Specific, ongoing, pleasure-based invitations are much easier to absorb. “I’m here. Let’s go to the movies. Or stay in and order takeout and watch some dumb TV.” “I’m having a party, it would be really great if you could come for a little while.” Ask them for help with things you know they are good at and like doing, so there is reciprocity and a way for them to contribute. “Will you come over Sunday and help me clear my closet of unfashionable and unflattering items? I trust your eye.” “Will you read this story I wrote and help me fix the dialogue?” “Want to make dinner together? You chop, I’ll assemble.” “I am going glasses shopping and I need another set of eyes.” Remind yourself why you like this person, and in the process, remind them that they are likable and worth your time and interest.

Talk to the parts of the person that aren’t being eaten by the depression. Make it as easy as possible to make and keep plans, if you have the emotional resources to be the initiator and to meet your friends a little more than halfway. If the person turns down a bunch of invitations in a row because (presumably) they don’t have the energy to be social, respect their autonomy by giving it a month or two and then try again. Keep the invitations simple; “Any chance we could have breakfast Saturday?” > “ARE YOU AVOIDING ME BECAUSE YOU’RE DEPRESSED OR BECAUSE YOU HATE ME I AM ONLY TRYING TO HELP YOU.” “I miss you and I want to see you” > “I’m worried about you.” A depressed person is going to have a shame spiral about how their shame is making them avoid you and how that’s giving them more shame, which is making them avoid you no matter what you do. No need for you to call attention to it. Just keep asking. “I want to see you” “Let’s do this thing.” “If you are feeling low, I understand, and I don’t want to impose on you, but I miss your face. Please come have coffee with me.” “Apology accepted. ApologIES accepted. So. Gelato and Outlander?”

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#613: How do I reach out to my friends who have depression? | Captain Awkward

P.S. A lot of people with depression and other mental illnesses have trouble making decisions or choosing from a bunch of different options. “Wanna get dinner at that pizza place on Tuesday night?” is a LOT easier to answer than “So wanna hang out sometime? What do you want to do?”

(via zahnie)

earth-dad

#613: How do I reach out to my friends who have depression? | Captain Awkward

P.S. A lot of people with depression and other mental illnesses have trouble making decisions or choosing from a bunch of different options. “Wanna get dinner at that pizza place on Tuesday night?” is a LOT easier to answer than “So wanna hang out sometime? What do you want to do?”

(via zahnie)

nenru

…Aren’t you supposed to be Sakata Gintoki? The man who’s let so much slip away, who’s failed to protect so much, but swore that he would never run away from his responsibilities! Didn’t you promise her husband?! Once you’ve decided to protect something, you’ll protect it to the very end! Isn’t that what makes you Sakata Gintoki?!

So what if Otose-san’s life was in danger?! That isn’t enough to kill Otose-san off! It isn’t enough to kill us off! It isn’t enough to kill you off! Because you’re going to protect us! Because we’re going to protect you! Isn’t that what Yorozuya is about? Isn’t that how the three of us protected so much over the years?

trans-carlos

Let’s just stop having genderbends. And nah don’t just change it to “spectrumslide” cause y’all still aren’t going to including trans and nonbinary people. Genderbends are gross and cissexist and really fucking hurtful to trans people. For you to add boobs to a character and say that makes them a girl is harmful. Stop it.

DARREN WILSON WAS FIRED FROM HIS FIRST POLICE JOB FOR BEING INVOLVED IN A SHOOTING OF A BLACK WOMAN.
startorrent02

He has a record of killing us an they hired him back and put him in a community that’s mainly black?!?!?! I CANNOT. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2732986/Darren-Wilson-s-policing-job-Missouri-police-department-shut-entire-force-replaced-amid-racism-corruption-allegations.html

untrue-posts

What happened in Ferguson is a tragedy, and the behavior of the Ferguson P.D. since the shooting has been shameful.

But it doesn’t help anyone when you spread lies. The officer who fired the shots in that case was David Hauck, not Darren Wilson. And none of the shots hit the woman (or even his actual target, which was the tires of the vehicle she was driving). Hauck resigned after the shooting.

It was also Hauck’s second time in hot water in his brief three-year career. He had previously been involved in a federal civil rights lawsuit after throwing a black woman off her porch after she told him that she could not move a van that was parked in front of her house because it doesn’t run. She testified that he also struck her and restrained her, and kicked her 15 year-old daughter. And that wasn’t enough to get Hauck fired from the Jennings Police Department at the time, even after the city paid an undisclosed sum to settle the lawsuit.

Yes, Wilson was fired (as was every other officer of the Jennings Police Department) when the City Council voted, by a 6-1 vote, to disband the department entirely because tensions between the police and the community were so high (not to mention the embezzlement, with a lieutenant accepting federal funds for sobriety checks that were never performed). And it speaks volumes that Wilson learned how to be a cop in such a corrupt and violent department.

But let’s not spread lies and make Michael Brown supporters look bad, please. OP has since edited their post but this version is still being spread around, and it’s not helpful in the slightest.

mizbingley

I wish Itachi was around to see Sakura basically become a member of Might Dai, Gai, and Rock Lee’s Circle of Winners Who Became Frighteningly Powerful Through Their Hard Work and Motivation can you just imagine Sasuke pulling some broody shit on Sakura and Itachi just places a hand on Sasuke’s shoulder, eyes wide”brother no we need to go we need to leave NOW” Itachi is afraid to look at Sakura directly in the eyes he knows what’s up

Anonymous sent
what did jontron do?
slunchy said

he used the word “retarded” (which is no longer an acceptable term to describe anyone with intellectual disabilities) as a negative word to describe a game console and a fan asked him politely over twitter not to do that, which, you know, is a reasonable request, seeing as it’s incredibly fucking offensive:
image

but jontron, being the empathetically stunted and ethically bankrupt gamer beardo we all knew in our heart of hearts that he was, blew up the entire thing, tried cracking jokes that were shitty even if you didn’t care about the slur, and generally acted like a huge asshat about it. Neil Cicierga called Jon out on twitter, telling him he was being a huge douchecanoe, and in response Jon just gushed at Neil, telling him he loved his work etc. completely ignoring the point at hand.

and then, just when you thought that you could pick up the shambles that remain of your loving devotion to Jontron’s quirky chubby gamer antics and reassemble some form of acceptance and tolerance for him as a person, he went on to call out Tim Schafer, who linked a video about violence against female gamers, and started attacking Tim about how men are depicted just as poorly as women are, exposing his final form to his fans: a whiny, self-important holier-than-thou MRA fucktruck whose only purpose in life is to prove everyone wrong about everything that isn’t about white male neckbeards.


and lo, built on nothing but piggybacking on Egoraptor’s success and cheetos dust, Jontron’s sprawling empire begins to crumble and collapse beneath him. former fans look on, horrified. i sit back and sip on a big mug of “i told you so.”

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