A juggalo, a deeply uncharismatic sociopath, and Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge-era Gerard Way walk into a bar.

They order drinks. This happens in a montage. The drinks arrive, also in a montage. There is choral chanting. 

The sociopath and Gerard Way share the same drink, sipping from different straws. They stare at one another in silence. The juggalo looks on. 

A long time passes. It is difficult to say how long. But just as it finally seems as though the sociopath may be about to say something out loud, Gerard Way rises and disappears into the bar bathroom.

He does not return. 

Moments later, a twelve year old in a cheap wig and an off-brand Lestat enter. The sociopath and juggalo exchange glances. They did not expect company.

The newcomers’ presence changes the whole vibe. The bar is weird now. How did this middle-schooler get in here? Why are he and not-Lestat fighting? Is anyone expected to care?

The sociopath remembers sharing a definitely non-sexual vodka cranberry with Gerard Way. Simpler times.

The juggalo starts to feel like he’s hanging out with the wrong people. 

Not-Lestat, it turns out, can’t hold his liquor, and folds down, head on the bar, in a matter of minutes. You can’t help but wonder why he was invited at all.

Meanwhile, the kid starts flicking pieces of olive off the garnish tray at the sociopath. The sociopath tries to enjoy his lonely vodka cranberry. The kid persists. The sociopath flicks an olive back. The kid gets up from his bar stool, walks across the room, and puts a cocktail umbrella through the sociopath’s eye. 

More choral music. Flashbacks to excruciatingly recent events. The kid leaves. The sociopath slides to the floor. Gerard Way still hasn’t come out of the bathroom. The juggalo sees himself out. 

The bartender wonders how this fucking trainwreck is so popular.

then it is up to me